edit: i went to two parties (one awkward, one awesome), danced myself DRIPPING IN SWEAT, and i didn’t drink at all. yeah yeah yeah! and i talked to excruciatingly cute people, and hey, it’s totally great to ride one’s bike home at 3:30 in the morning, yo! it makes me sad/happy to be excited that i was able to be social in a large group of people without drinking or going home upset :/

getting ready for a party:

  • goddamn adult acne (27, i turn 27 on sunday. fuck and still all this cystic acne shit on my jaw)
  • oh no what if i get overwhelmed by the crowd. RD+too many people=panic panic panic?
  • drinking? i might be too exhausted for drinking.
  • taking my sweety to a show with me tomorrow, where he will meet a bunch of other rad folks. oh god the overlapping of social circles when dating someone long-termish, it is terrifying.
  • ++: being a gender-deevs transcmasculine person, not always getting seen as a dude-identified person. people doubletaking when they see he and i being affectionate in public, because what’s that dyke doing with that dude?!
  • well, cis: gender ain’t sexuality. y’know? well, you should.
  • Paul Baribeau, I fucking love you, as usual.
  • ughhhhhh people.

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