Other dreams:

I dreamt that I was homeless* again, and spent much of my time trying to sleep in the bushes in downtown Portland, Maine, or in public parks trying not to get arrested for vagrancy, or finding public restrooms to wash up/get water/excrete/change clothes. Somehow some of my friends (P, and a few others) and I got recruited for some kind of contest by some asshole television producers. We were playing the game (which involved some sort of running around in a circle and hopping) when one of my muscles began to spasm. Without my consent, one of the other contestants (who was some kind of yoga teacher asshole) began to try to force me to stretch it out, while I yelled at her to stop touching me. Finally she did, and one of the producers started mocking me for calling her out. I said “fuck this! This is inappropriate!” and walked out. My friends followed me. I think we walked down to the waterfront to beg for spare change and hope we could get up enough for one of those bread bowls of clam chowder. Then I woke up, proud of myself, and rolled close to J_, tried to steal back the covers he had gotten away with in the night.

I dreamt that I went to a shitty party. I don’t really remember most of the party except people trying to make out at me, and me trying to make out at people, and all of it feeling not-great because drunk people suck at consent and/or most types of communication, especially the kind they will remember the nuances of in the morning. Finally I tried to sleep on the floor while two people fucked in the bed above me, but couldn’t sleep. When I went home, P. was inexplicably in my bed, and I curled up next to him with my head on his shoulder and finally fell asleep. It was nice.


*most of my homelessness has not been the houseless, sleeping out-of-doors kind, but the home-less kind, couchsurfing without a foreseeable end kind. once when i was 14 i ran away and slept in someone who i had met in the park’s backyard for a few nights, but that’s a whole ‘nother story, and really the exception to the rule.


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